Tag: pet phrases

Pet phrases ultimately distract readers.

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing

I’m reading a bestselling novel that uses one word and one phrase multiple times, and my first thought is: “Why didn’t the author or the publisher’s editor catch this?” When I write, I sometimes think up a cool bit of dialogue or an apt bit of description. Funny thing is, the first few times I use them, these bits and pieces of language seem fresh and new.

But then my intuition starts nagging at me: “Malcolm, you’ve seen these words before.” There are probably fancy applications that will ferret out suspected words and phrases that have been overused. I have no idea what they are, so I use the “find” feature in Word.

If I think I might have used a word or phrase too often, I type in a phrase such as “passel of popes.” Sometimes I’m shocked at how often I used it. The repetition of phrases, especially slang or a character’s often-used cliché can help define that character and make him/her different from the others in the cast. This fails when multiple characters are using the same cliché

That’s not only unlikely but kills the differentiation between characters the author was trying to achieve. One phrase that’s been overused in the novel I’m reading is “If you say so, Sir.”

I’ll give the author some slack by suggesting that phrase might have been popular in the 1950s where the novel is set. In today’s usage, that phrase is considered sarcastically cutting, meaning, “I think that’s really stupid but you’re entitled to your opinion”–not something I’d want to say to an officer who outranks me. The phase fails to have any impact when dozens of characters are saying it. The publisher should have caught this.

The word the author used over and over is “precious,” in this case, referring to something hard to find and yet essential, as in “The soldiers found a supply depot filled with precious rations.”  Or precious fuel. Or precious ammo. Maybe the author sees this as a stylistic device. I don’t.

I wish he’d used a different word about 95% of the time. It’s easy to miss overused words and phrases in our own work. A good beta reader and/or a good editor might catch most of them. Otherwise, if you think you said “passel of popes” too often, let Word tell you how often that was. —Malcolm

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A good editor will help you get rid of your pet phrases

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing

I’m not sure where pet phrases begin, but almost every novel I’ve written has ended up with the overuse of some phrase or word choice that my editors and I try to find and remove before publication.

Now some pet phrases help define a character. One character might typically say, “you got that right” and another might say “goodness gracious.” As long as they aren’t saying these things on every page, these phrases help define them.

However, things get out of hand if all the characters in your stories and novels are saying, “you got that right.” What are the odds that would ever happen? Some authors become aware of the fact they are using a phrase way too often before they finish the first draft, while others don’t notice it until they’re in the editing process.

If I suspect I’m using a phrase over and over, I search for that phrase in my Word Document to see if it shows up too often. When it does, I go through the manuscript and get rid of it.

I thought of this today while reading a mainstream novel by a popular author. When the police or FBI investigators informed a character of some fact or event, the characters often respond with “did she?” While such a response could equally be a favorite of one character, it can’t possibly fit all the characters in the book. So, the phrase stands out because it has been overused as a response in the story. A good editor should have caught this.

I notice it because “did she” and “did she really” are phrases that I’ve seen in U. K. novels and films of another era and seem a bit out of place when they appear over and over in an American novel. The phrase, as far as I know, is not part of a fad in this country. If it were, you could use it more often, though it would–of course–date the novel.

It has always amazed me how often I can use what I think is a fresh and creative way of saying something, only to find out that I’ve used it twenty times already in the manuscript.

–Malcolm

 

The tedious (but necessary) part of editing

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing3 Comments

When I read an author’s work for the first time, I quickly discover his or her habits, pet phrases, favorite sentence structures, and unique approaches to dialogue or description. I also see whether or not s/he has taken a word, phrase or mannerism that was magical the first time it appeared and then reduced its impact by using it excessively throughout the rest of the novel.

For example, if the author describes war in chapter one as “an honorable horror” or sex with a main character as “wanton enchantment,” I might like the creativity of those phrases. If, as I read, I begin to see “honorable horror” or “wanton enchantment” showing up multiple times, I think, what a pity, you’ve just destroyed the impact of the right words at the right time, by using them every time.

Habit Words

Most of us are so used to the way we talk and write, we don’t always notice our own beautiful phrases and favorite words, much less those occasions when we overuse them. You’ve probably seen talk show hosts and others joking about people who can’t say anything without saying “like” and “you know” several times per paragraph. In most cases, the “like” and “you know” people don’t know how odd they sound to others because they don’t realize how often they say those words.

As writers, we’re often unaware of the special phrases in our own work that become trite through overuse by the end of an article, novel or short story, much less the everyday words we habitually rely upon so often that they become as trite as “like” and “you know.”  For one person, foods may typically be “tasty” or friends might be “dear” or one thing or another might be “memorable.”

In conversation, perhaps we can get away with our habit words. In writing, they become blemishes.This is not to say we need to eliminate them or, worse yet, use a thesaurus for a series of minor variations on them. But we do need to see how we’re using them and whether they are really serving us well when they appear frequently in our work.

Editing

A good editor will not only find your errors and inconsistencies, s/he will also find your watered down beautiful phrases and your overused habit words. For authors, the task is more difficult because we’re often focusing on scenes, chapters and plots while our distracting habits fly by unnoticed.

When we copy edit our manuscripts closely, though, pet phrases and habit words might start getting our attention. Perhaps we change them on the spot or perhaps we start making a list of words we might be overusing. Once the major elements of a work are fixed, the spelling and grammatical errors caught and the punctuation and overly complex sentence structures are fixed, it’s time to go through the manuscript again with what (for me) is a tedious by necessary part of editing.

I suggest using your word processing software’s search feature as one way to find your habit words. If you creatively wrote “an honorable horror” in page one of your book, search on the word “honorable” and see how often it appears. You may be shocked to discover you not only used “an honorable horror” multiple times in your 80,000-word book, but that you started using the word “honorable” in other combinations, i.e., “an honorable moment,” “an honorable job,” or “an honorable disposition.” Worse yet, the word combination will be coming out of the mouths of multiple characters as though they met somewhere and agreed to adopt a new pet phrase.

The search feature will also show you whether you’ve used habit words so often they’ll become a distraction to readers. One author might describe everything from people to days to dinners to experiences as “fine,” while another may use the word “dear” over an over. If the search feature tells you the word “fine” appears a hundred times in your book, you might want to go look at why that’s the case.

By the time you clean the pet phrases and habit words out of your manuscripts, I think you’ll see that your prose is not only stronger, it’s more on point in every scene and sequence of dialogue.

—Malcolm

Malcolm R. Campbell is the author of the contemporary fantasy novels “Sarabande.” “The Sun Singer,” and the upcoming “The Seeker.”