Category: writing

Nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing2 Comments

Actually a lot of people know even though they might not know that they know. The troubles I’ve seen, experienced, and caused often end up in my novels and short stories.

Naturally, I take out the names of the guilty except my own which is on the cover.

When the troubles are really bad, I call a tow truck and have them hauled into a cut-rate body shop where they (the purported experts) knock out the worst dents, fix the tail lights (so the cops have no excuse for pulling me over), and get rid of the blood. Once the trouble is dumped back in my driveway, nobody recognizes it for what it was.

People love reading about troubles because they want to vicariously experence the fear, angst, thrills, loathing, and sickness unto death without walking the walk. That’s why there’s always more bad news than good news, and why King, Grisham, and Patterson sell a lot of books. People always seem to be attracted to bad things that happen to other people and, when they can, they go on TV and say, “He seemed like such a nice kid.”

But for heaven’s sake, don’t keep a diary because long after you’re dead, dead, and gone, some Wikipedia writer will say, “Hey, you know all those murder mysteries Lucy Lake wrote about? She really killed all those people, changed their names, and laughed all the way to the bank to deposit her royalty checks.” That revelation wil increase sales after you’re dead, but the blemish to your legacy will probably delete your legacy.

So, what have we learned?

  1. Tidy up your troubles.
  2. Change the names of the guilty.
  3. Turn your troubles into riveting page turners.
  4. Destroy all diaries, letters, and Facebook entries that will haunt you and/or your heirs.
  5. Act like the kind of person who would never do the stuff you write about.

With this advice, James Patterson will be calling you soon to collaborate on a bestseller from Grand Central Publishing. No doubt, it will be a riveting page turner.

Once you’re rich and famous, feel free to list me as a mentor in your acknowledgements.

—Malcolm

Sometimes, you can turn troubles into satire:

How the hell did I miss that?

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing2 Comments

I’ve done a lot of research into the Florida Panhandle part of the state where I grew up to make sure I got the facts right for my Florida Folk Magic Series of novels. Mostly, I’m looking up things I remember just to check my memory. <g> What exasperates me, is stumbling onto stuff that, figuratively speaking happened right under my nose–and I missed it. Never heard of it, not on my RADAR, might as well have been going in in another part of the country.

Wikipedia Photo

Now, it’s happened again. I’m researching north Florida for another story and I find a vibrant African American community that people at levels of governement wanted to get rid of because they considered it an eyesore. They wanted the land for “better” things. “Hmm,” they said, “we’ll call our needs ‘urban renewal.'”

As I read about this, I see citations to the daily newspaper that landed in our front yard every afternoon. I see the names of the editor and the reporters from that paper all of who knew personally or was familiar with from constantly seeing their bylines.

And yet, nothing about the systemic racism disguised under various politically correct pretexts is familiar. I should mention that the community was on the other side of town and far away from the places we shopped, went to school, or saw movies. I delivered telegrams all over the city, including many African American enclaves, but never there. And yet, the debate simmered in the press and in civic and government meetings around town for about ten years.

That’s why I have to ask again, “How the hell did miss that?”

I feel like I’m researching something that happened far away rather than ten miles from my house. My parents are long gone, so I can’t ask them whether we discussed this at the dinner table. If they did, I must have zoned out inasmuch as my thinking was focused on my part time jobs, my courses, and what girl would be sitting next to me in class.

So there it is: totally unaware of a nasty little scheme that included the governor, the city council, the merchants, and the service clubs. I wish I could say that I missed all this because I was drunk.

Okay, so I have no excuse. The characters in my story are going to know about it and talk about it even if I was clueless in those days.

—Malcolm

Your memories make good stories

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing2 Comments

By the time you’re older than dirt you’ll probably have enough material in your mind’s memory banks to write a shelf full of novels. Unfortunately, you’ve probably also forgotten enough stuff that could have turned into another shelf full of novels. Write it before you forget it.

My memorites of time served in the navy, working as a seasonal employee in Glacier National Park, Boy Scout camping trips, various jobs and all kinds of hobbies and avocation have provided the inspiration behind a lot of my work. The danger here is that when you’re almost older than dirt, the fictional version of those memories used in your novels and stories gets mixed up with what really happened. (I should have kept a diary.)

Some memories are almost universal and capture readers who’ve gone through similar experiences:

  • Young love. The first time you got dumped by the person you thought you were going to marry.
  • The cops: The various times you were caught for shop lifting, speeding, trespassing, or running guns or booze across a border.
  • Jobs: How you got fired from a job for something you didn’t do.
  • Travel: Crazy and wonderful things happen when we travel. Is there a story there? Probably.
  • Family: Maybe you were the black sheep in your family. Maybe it was Aunt Flossie or cousin Jimmy. There’s probably more stuff in this category than you can shake a stick at. You can always change the names to protect the guilty.
  • Daily life: Weird stuff (or wonderful stuff) happens every day. Sometimes there’s a story there even though your life might seem fairly normal to you.

I’ve used a lot of this in my stories, though I cannot tell you when and where because, well, the truth behind the stories is rather confidential.  Sure, there may be awkward questions from friends and family, such as “How did you write about these bar girls so realistically” and “You really did a good job with those drunk tank scenes; how did you know about all that?”

Imagination and research. That answers all questions even if your memories were part of the research.

—Malcolm

Of course a lot of stuff in this novel really happened. That’s the beauty of having been there. You have an infinite amount of material. The ship in the cover picture is the ship I served on during the Vietnam War. There were hundreds of stories there because it was a large ship and had a large crew.

perhaps I’ll set a story in Tallahassee

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing

There’s a group on Facebook that focuses on remembering Tallahassee, Florida. The group’s idea of “the past” tends to focus on the memories of people who are younger than I am, so this means that when somebody asks something like, “Does anyone remember the Tsunami Cafe,” it turns out that the cafe came and went after was long gone from the town where I grew up.

Other than a few short stories in my Widely Scattered Ghosts collection–and brief mention in a long-ago novel–I prefer placing the action of my Florida Folk Magic Series in a fictional town west of Tallahassee. Why? Because I control the town and don’t have to worry about conflicting with real events there (because there aren’t any).

But placing story in Tallahassee has always bothered me because I haven’t been there since 1987 and really know very little about what’s happened there since then. However, my 1954-era novel Fate’s Arrows ends with the main character moving to Tallahassee. So, now I’m stuck. If I write a short story about her, it needs to happen in Tallahassee in the early 1950s.

Heck, I was in grade school then, so it’s not like my memories of the town will help. Fortunately, I may have found a resource that will work, one that focuses on what things were like before I was old enough to known about and/or understand what things were like in Tallahassee. It’s in the mail and will arrive by the end of the week.

I’m excited about seeing it so I can figure out just how to merge my fictional Pollyanna Hoskins character, who may or may not work for the CIA, into the real events of Florida’s capital. I hope I can make it work because–with some trepidation–I’m looking forward to going home again (figuratively speaking).

If the thing works, I’ll get back to you. If it doesn’t work, I’ll delete this post and–like the real CIA–will disavow any knowledge about anything, you know, due to national security.

—Malcolm

those innocent days of cap pistols and water guns

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn toys, writing

These days, guns are no laughing matter because kids are killing each other with the real thing, intentionally or accidentally, and it’s generally illegal to make toy guns that look too real or to make a toy gun without a splash of yellow or orange coloring at the end of the barrel.

Back in the old days, we played cops and robbers or ar army with cap pistols and water guns and the police and our liberal parents saw nothing wrong in that. When you got shot, you fell down, counted to 50, and then got back in the game.

Mother used to tell the story about the time she walked into my bedroom and I shot her with a water gun which, like the guns of detectives and mobsters, was at the ready in the righthand drawer of my desk.

Even though we were both laughing, she said, “What have I told you boys about loaded water guns in the house” and I said, “What have I told you about coming into my bedroom without knocking?”

We agreed to do better. When asked why she was all wet, I said I thought the sudden opening of my door was part of a mob hit.

“What?”

“Well, you and dad live at the safe end of the house, but when you come back here, you’re in a zone so dangerous that even the cops won’t patrol after dark. This is the part of the house you see on TV detective shows: it’s just not safe.”

“Oh my,” she said. “How can we fix it?”

“You and dad need to start carrying,” I said.

That was funny then, but it wouldn’t be now because kids are doing the same thing with real guns. I don’t know if our kind of playing turned evil or if changing times brought evils into our homes and schools we didn’t know existed fifty years ago. So far, the answer to the problem seems to be that all of us need to start carrying, and then when friends come over for dinner, everybody has to check their guns and ammo at the door.

As a pacifist (yeah, from that childhood, who’d have thought it), I despair at every stupid gun death in the home, the latest school shooting, and the unchecked violence against cops and others in our cities. I wish somebody had an answer. It bothers me that “they” don’t.

Counting to fifty just doesn’t work anymore.

—Malcolm

Sunday’s gallimaufry

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn Potpourri, writing

Educational note: The funny word in the header means “a confused jumble or medley of things.” Or, possibly hash.

  • Tonight’s dinner is Kraft Mac & Cheese. Any questions?
  • Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and he’s delivered a festive batch of cold air, dangerous chill factors, and a dusting of snow to the Southern states. This goes to show that he likes us a lot more than those poor clowns in Boston and points north. A Facebook meme advised those of us in Georgia who aren’t used to snowy roads to drive as though granny’s in the back seat wearing a new dress and holding a crock pot of gravy on her lap.
  • Dining by Rail. This is my favorite book of railroad dining car recipes and history. The book was written by a chef who compiled these culinary delights for home use. See my review on the Depot Cafe blog. The recipes are very good and worthy of trying out on granny.
  • Santa brought me a jar of Burt’s Bees ointment. Little did I know that I was doing to get clawed up by one of our cats ending up with an arm that’s black and blue and bleeding. The bee stuff seems to be helping.  (I was not paid anything by Burt to include this endorsement.)
  • Finally, Kumquats. Every year during kumquat season, I ask the produce manager at Publix where they’ve hidden in kumquats. The what? So, I’ve gone to the Publix website and asked the same question, and for years I’ve heard stuff like “our grower switched to another product” and “the kumquats got carried off by seagulls and manatees.” This year, for a brief shining moment, the store had kumquats. I think I bought most of them.
  • Re-reading great books: I re-read books that I like multiple times. This week, it’s Kristin Hannah’s The Nightingale. This book is beautifully written even thought the Nazi actions and characters make me angry enough to spit nails–or worse. As an author, I’m impressed with the research Hannah had to do get her facts right while creating an authentic ambiance for the times and people. I feel the same way about The Dove Keepers and a few other books that my reading addicition draws me back to again and again.

Have a great weekend,

—Malcolm

Malcolm R. Campbell writes books that–well, at least some of them–are worth keeping on your nightstand to re again and again.

Thumbing my nose at authority for 50+ years

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn Malcolm R. Campbell, writing

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies. – Groucho Marx

My problems with authority began in grade school and continue to this day. You see some evidence of that in the occasional fake news stories printed in this blog under the pseudonym Jock Stewart. I used to write these on earlier blogs and collected some of them in a book published by Lulu ten years ago. (It’s still there.)

A previous publisher saw these satircal news stories on my earlier blos and kept collecting them into novella-length collections. They’re no longer there because that publisher is no longer there.

The people who know me well (wife, neighbors, family, publisher) believe the “real me” is Jock Stewart rather than the angelic persona you see on this blog. The people who think I’m Jock Stewart believe that my thriller/satire novel Special Investigative Reporter is a memoir.

Maybe yes, maybe no.

In general, I agree with Groucho though, of course, I don’t get any traction out of that because he’s no longer there. Pratically speaking, I think politicians should have expiration dates so that they can do less damage to the country.

My superiors in the Navy knew I had this impression about them, meaning that my relationship with the brass was about like that of Alan Alda’s relationship with the brass in M*A*S*H. You’ll see some of this attitude in my Vietnam War novel At Sea.

In general, my authority problems have served me well in writing novels and short stories about people with authority problems. So that’s good, right?

—Malcolm

Malcolm R. Campbell writes satire because, well, society needs a quasi-sane voice in this chaotic old world of ours who’s not afraid to to call a crook a crook. He stands ready to swear on a stack of phone books that “Special Investigative Reporter” is fiction. Well, mostly.

Holocaust novel ‘Maus’ banned in Tennessee school district 

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn News and Issues, writing2 Comments

ATHENS, Tenn. (AP) — A Tennessee school district has voted to ban a Pulitzer Prize-winning graphic novel about the Holocaust due to “inappropriate language” and an illustration of a nude woman, according to minutes from a board meeting.

Source: Holocaust novel ‘Maus’ banned in Tennessee school district | AP News

The Associated Press notes that “The nude woman is drawn as a mouse. In the graphic novel, Jews are drawn as mice and the Nazis are drawn as cats.”

According to a tweet by the U.S. Holocaust Museum: “Maus has played a vital role in educating about the Holocaust through sharing detailed and personal experiences of victims and survivors. On the eve of International #HolocaustRemembranceDay, it is more important than ever for students to learn this history.”

One news story, which I cannot find now, noted that it’s increasingly difficult to teach historical events to students who weren’t even born when 9/11 occurred. I can see how this would be a challenge to history teachers: making the events of the past relevant to a generation focused on texting the current moment as though there were never any earlier moments.

Maus is not a pleasant book, but then neither is the subject matter and the lessons we learn from being made uncomfortable about the world’s worst moment are, I think, vital to our understanding of how we became the people we are now.

—Malcolm

Diana Gabaldon to receive Great Scot Award

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing

from the National Trust for Scotland Foundation

January 18, 2022, New York City – American author Diana Gabaldon has brought the romance and drama of Scottish history to life for more than 50 million readers worldwide with her best-selling Outlander novels. Now, The National Trust for Scotland Foundation USA will recognize her extraordinary contributions to Scotland and America’s shared heritage by presenting her with the 2022 Great Scot Award at their 15th annual fundraising gala, A Celebration of Scotland’s Treasures, on April 14, 2022.

“2022 has been designated Scotland’s Year of Stories, and so it seems especially appropriate to honor Diana Gabaldon, whose stories have come to embody Scotland and Scottish culture for millions of readers and television watchers around the world,” said Helen E.R. Sayles CBE, The National Trust for Scotland Foundation USA’s chair. “We are delighted to have the opportunity to thank her for inspiring so many to explore and fall in love with Scotland.”

Ms. Gabaldon’s first novel, Outlander, was published in 1991, and the story has extended across eight additional New York Times bestselling volumes. The latest, Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone, was published in November 2021.

Largely set in 18th-century Scotland, many of the Outlander novels use actual historic events as the backdrop for Claire and Jamie Fraser’s romance. Some of these, including the 1746 Battle of Culloden, are historic sites now in the care of the National Trust for Scotland.

In addition, National Trust for Scotland properties including Falkland Palace, Preston Mill, and the Village of Culross, have been used in filming the Sony / Starz television series based on Ms. Gabaldon’s work. The series stars Catriona Balfe and Sam Heughan, and its sixth season premieres on March 6, 2022.

“I have seen firsthand how American readers have embraced Scottish culture through their love of Outlander,” said Kirstin Bridier, executive director of NTSUSA. “Many of her readers have contributed generously to the preservation of National Trust for Scotland sites associated with the novels and television show – sites like Preston Mill. We could not ask for a better ambassador for our work.”

The presentation of the Great Scot Award is at the heart of a black-tie event that raises funds to support Scotland’s largest conservation charity. Past recipients of the award include documentary filmmaker Ken Burns, comedian Sir Billy Connolly, Golden Globe-winning actor Brian Cox, endurance athlete and world-record breaking cyclist Mark Beaumont, sculptor Andy Scott, and authors Denise Mina and Alexander McCall Smith.

A Celebration of Scotland’s Treasures is a festive evening that features a whisky tasting by The Macallan; the recitation of Burns’ Ode to a Haggis by Alasdair Nichol, Chairman of Freeman’s auction house and a frequent appraiser on PBS’s Antiques Roadshow; Scottish country dancing; and live and silent auctions. Before heading home, guests form a circle, clasp hands, and sing Auld Lang Syne.

—
Meal do naidheachd, a sheann charaid!
(Congratulations, old friend!)

Do you ‘see’ your story as you write?

On By Malcolm R. CampbellIn writing3 Comments

“Mikaella Clements interviews various authors about how their visual imagination (or lack thereof) informs their writing. The answers run the gamut: “I rarely visualize what I’m writing because visualization takes effort and can be distracting,” says Talia Hibbert. While Claire Messud says, “When I’m in a world it’s like a 3D five senses movie. I’m there.” (Washington Post)” – From Poets & Writers

On weekdays, I check Poets & Writers overview of literary headlines. When I read the blurb above, my first thought was that I wasn’t going to be able to see the entire story due to the Washington Post’s pay wall. That was frustrating because, after seeing the comment by Talia Hibbert, I wondered how anyone could possibly create a story without seeing it in their mind’s eye.

I guess we all assume that what we experience while writing is similar to what other authors experience. Since I “automatically ‘see'” the characters and locations I’m creating in my fiction, I wondered how visualization could be distracting, much less take an effort to accomplish.

As Messud says, “I’m there.”

In fact, I couldn’t avoid being there even if I wanted to because images appear (unbidden but welcome) while I write. True, they’re often somewhat determined by the research I do, especially when it comes to the look and feel of locations. 

“Seeing’ absolutely nothing would, for me, be a distraction. It would be like writing in a dark room with my eyes closed. Heck, I’d probably ‘see’ the story anyway.

If you write fiction, does your mind create pictures of your location and your characters while you’re writing? (Just wondering.) If you do see those pictures, are they helpful or distracting?

I’m always writing, so to speak, about a mental movie I’m watching. But maybe most writers don’t approach their work this way. When I hear that other writers don’t/won’t/can’t to this, I’m filled with wonder about how the process of creation works.

—Malcolm

Malcolm R. Campbell is the author of contemporary fantasy, realism, magical realism, and paranormal stories and novels.